For You

Being pregnant with you has been the most awe-inspiring and, at times, challenging experience of my life. It seems that each month brings exciting new events that have amazed your dad and me. The first few months I was pregnant with you were challenging in the fact that I really didn't feel well most days. Basically, I woke up feeling bad and went to bed feeling much the same. But, the sickness passed after the first four months and I tried to get on with things.

Along the way, we have faced some difficult news especially when we found out there was a cyst on your brain. We were very scared as we waited four days to have a special ultrasound. Thankfully, this ultrasound showed that you were growing right on target! Your brain, heart and limbs all appeared perfect, which is exactly what the doctors told us to hope for. The good news is that the cyst is probably already gone and it was just an isolated incident. As your mom and your current home, I too have faced some challenging health issues. Right now I am wearing a heart monitor (which I really hate) but the doctor's orders were to wear it for a month. While pregnant, my heart has begun beating very fast and hard and a few times I have nearly fainted. In a couple weeks we will know what is going on. But for now, I'm just trying to provide you with the best, safest and healthiest home I can.

One of the reasons I wanted to write you this letter was to share some wonderful memories over the past few weeks. About a week ago, I was lying in bed reading a book and your dad was falling asleep next to me. All of the sudden you started to kick me very hard and then it felt like you were doing somersaults in my belly. I lifted up my shirt a little bit to take a closer look at my belly. Sure enough, I could actually see you moving in there. I quickly decided to wake up your dad because I was sure he wouldn't want to miss this. I told him to just watch my belly and right away you started movin' and shakin' in there. We loved the little show you put on for us! I'm not sure words can adequately describe the overwhelming sense of joy I felt knowing you were growing so well inside of me. I also began feeling proud to be your mom and growing even more anxious to meet you. I know one day I will forget the exact feeling of what it was like to have you move inside of me, but I will never forget the intense emotions associated with these days. We love you already.

You seem to have distinct patterns of being awake and asleep. You really enjoy moving around in the early afternoon and by about nine at night all bets are off... this is when you really start kicking and rolling around. And then, when I am finally able to go to sleep you start kicking again. But that's okay, I truly love every move you make.

If all goes according to schedule, in less than three months you will be here with us. Then we will finally be able to meet you and know if you are Samuel or Maggie. But for now, we watch, wait and do our best to get prepared for your arrival. Enjoy your time in there and I will do my best to keep you safe and secure.

one more thing...

If one more person asks me if I am having twins I might lose it!



This happened at least two times this week. I don't think I am that big at all (my mother and husband agree with me of course) but I think because my stomach is very round (like a basketball in there) and am all baby in the front I might appear larger.



So, to answer the question... NO, there is only one baby in there! I've seen him or her several times. This doesn't mean the baby isn't big because that may very well be the case. But I am fine with that.



If you think I look huge the next time you see me, please keep it to yourself! :)

Dan gets kicked!

This past Wednesday night, Dan felt the baby kick for the first time! It was pretty exciting for both of us really. For the past few weeks, I have been feeling the baby very often (he or she has a distinct kicking/moving schedule) and I always try to get Dan to feel it. Unfortunately, it seemed as soon as Dan would put his hand on my stomach and push the baby would move or stop kicking. So, on this night, the baby was very active and I told Dan to try again. He push on my stomach and instantly felt about three kicks in a row. I wish I had a picture of his face because it was priceless. He got this excited look but then looked to me for confirmation that he was feeling the "right" thing. He was. He pushed again and the baby pushed him back! As I type, this little baby is rockin' and rollin' in there again.

My mom told me that I had a very distinct kicking scheduled too, and that 6-8pm was my prime kicking time. She also said that when I was born 6-8pm was my crying and stress-relieving time. This meant that she didn't eat a hot meal for many months... sorry mom! Guess we will see what this little bugger has in store for us each night. I'm sure we are up for the challenge... at least we better be!

Christmas in California

We had a wonderful Christmas in Manhattan Beach, California (where my brother and sister-in-law live). While it was a little different not to spend Christmas in the bitter cold, it was a great chance to get away, relax and see some new things. We spent a few days in Santa Barbara and Montecito which was very fun and so beautiful! My sister-in-law, Julie, was able to put up her first Christmas tree in I think about 13 years.

I will say that I don't plan on flying again until after the baby is here. The flight out wasn't too bad... I just up and walked 5 times. But the flight home was awful... tons of screaming kids, I pulled a muscle or something in my back which hurt so bad I had to do deep breathing to get through the pain, and just a lot of sitting! Oh well, it was worth it to have a great trip in southern California.

91st Percentile

I learned today that little baby is not so little... he or she is weighing in at exactly 1 pound!!!

At 21 weeks, that puts the baby in the 91st percentile for size. That's a pretty big baby. So we'll see how things progress and whether or not I have to deliver a 10 pound baby!

Belly Shots

15 or 16 weeks (above)

20 weeks (above)

So, it seems that right after Thanksgiving my belly just popped. And no, I didn't eat an entire turkey but the belly is definitely sticking out more. Right now I am 21 weeks. I had a picture with my shirt pulled down but I think it made me look bigger than I really am (and I don't need to stare at pictures like that now). The baby and I are measuring in the 46th percentile, whatever that means. I think it means we aren't too little and we aren't too big. I am doing my best to work out a few times a week and keep my energy up. I'm sure more pictures will follow.

20 weeks and counting!

Had our 20-week ultrasound this morning. Technically, this is when they should be able to determine the baby's sex but sorry for those of you still hoping... we didn't find out. The technician even avoided that area. But for most of the time the baby's ankles were crossed and its knees were pulled up.



We got some incredible pictures and they recorded it. I had to go out last night and find a VHS tape because that's all they use at the dr's office! We will be converting it to DVD... (then we will post some pictures)



I'm not sure how to adequately describe the feelings associated with seeing the baby and now looking at these pictures. It is truly an incredible experience and responsibility. Our responsibility as parents has already begun. A coworker said to me today that Dan and I are entrusted to be good stewards of this life. I haven't ever thought of it that way but she is absolutely right. I feel so blessed to carry this baby and then to raise him or her with Dan. Lately, I feel like I think about this baby and being pregnant every minute of every day.



He or she was moving all around... waving at us, kicking his legs, rolling over and even opening and closing his mouth! That was pretty awesome. The technician repeatedly commented on how active he or she is... oh great, I thought, a sign of things to come? The heartbeat was strong, a little slower than a few weeks ago. We also saw the kidneys, stomach, all four chambers of the heart and various parts of the brain.



There is an amazing picture of the baby's profile and it almost looks like light is shining on his face. You can so clearly see his eyes, nose and the mouth is open. I still haven't felt any movement but I should very soon. Then, I'm told, I will be hoping for relief. Right now, I'm just eagerly anticiapting those first waves of movement and kicks!